-

wow..it has been a long time i didnt update my blog..
blog was a very famous thing dring my secondary school..
nw..everyone wil on their fb..fb..fb..
some of them even ignore their msn,friendster n blog..
i remembered during the period of my secondary school..
the first thing i wil do was open my pc n go to other ppl's blog to leave comment n update my own blog..
i really miss the time when i was in secondary school..
especially the time we study for exam together n we hav or lunch,dinner together..
i really miss tat time..
uni life??so free??so bz??
haiz..
there is no real fren in my uni at all..
they jz look for the rich ppl, smart ppl..
tat's all..

i jz tel myself to ignore u..
today miss kat suddenly mentioned ur name..
asked where is u?
y din attend the recent tutorial?
all of them answered..
i reali hope tat i could tel miss kat tat u dropped the course..
i pretended nt to answer..
continued wif my question..
i hope tat u no longer in my heart..
u r the 1st one who made me felt wat is love..
u made me felt happy..
BUT
u also the one who made me sad..
u told me wat is grief..
i cried..
cant sleep at nite..
jz thinking of how 2 save our relationship..
how 2 make me n u felt better..
NOW
i jz remembered how cruel r u..
i remembered..
"can i sit beside u during class later?"
"cant..."(wif tat cruel eyes)
i would never forget how u treat me..
u should the one who awarded "the best liar"..


i told myself nt to give u neither chances to hurt me n made me grief..
thx 4 giving me the "unforgetful" experiences..
i wil remind myself..


true love?
i jz hope u dun come into my heart n make me sad again..
i so scared of love..
being single is the better life for me..


money wil be the merely love for me..
even no true love...
cos i jz dunwan to be hurted again..
i so scare of love..


is so suffer..
although i became better..
i jz hope tat i wont gt injury of love in my future..

my fren asked me bout u..
i jz smiled n pretend nt to ans her question..
i thought tat i became better after i wrote it out..n even cried..
i told myself early in the morning mz be happy..
when i heard the song "two is better than one"..my heart started to cry silently..
i hope tat my heart wil find another way..
love??
someone told me while u in love dun forget tat u also addicted wif drugs at the same time..
it could make u happy bt it also wil make u suffer..
the happier the more suffer u would be..
i tried to customary my life without u..
y the result stil the same??
i felt suffer when i closed my eyes at the night..
i tried my best to sleep without u in my heart..
i cant even sleep as previous..
u know how i slept after u leave me??
u dun even how suffer am i..
i slept beside my assignment n laptop..
jz too tired..
this is the only way for me to sleep..
can u show me the road??

y i still cant forget u??
can u tel me how u forget me to reduce my pain??
is reali pain deep in my heart..
i choosed to ignore everything bout u..
i forced myself nt to sms u or even go ur facebook n hav a look..
i even nt dare to ask ppl around me bout u..
i jz knew some updated news bout u from them..
i reali hope tat u wil tel me ur recent life voluntary cos i stil care bout u..
even we cant be together..
bt i stil hope tat we can make friend like the previous period..
things changed since we choose to leave each other..
i wil miss tat time we be together..
i thought my heart nt tat pain..
i thought tat i wont cry when i recall u..
my mind cant stop thinking bout u when i am alone..
i know tat we cant even meet in the future..
i reali hope tat u can bring along the memory between u n me go far away..
i noe its nt easy to recover..
hope tat my heart wont be tat pain..
cry??
i know it doesnt make sense..

i have nth to do..
juz dunno y..
i cant control my emotion..
sometimes i wil b crying at the nite..just too hurt or sad i think..
hope that i wil b ok..
meyb time is the best way for me..
just give me sometimes..
my brother keep scolding me..
he said i ad waste so many time..
i also hope that i can forget this painful life forever..
nvm..just give myself some times..
i sure can do it..
i trust myself..
i wanna b strong..i hope that my brother can understand me..
no one treat me better than my brother treat me..
please forgive me..
i know i have no time..
but i also hope that i can concentrate in my studies..
constitution is so hard..i dunno what the lecturer talking about..
criminal law still ok..contract law as well..
legal skill n LMS..i have no comment cos of that stupid lecturer..i dunno y they can become my lecturer since they dun evn know the way to teach us..
haiz..
so stress..

today no class..but so angry cos dunno the enrolment key for my crinal law n law of contract..
cant read notes..
today went nichii wif my bro's galfren..
so cheap all the shirt over there..
hmm..
i have nothing to do..hope tat i can log in the e-learning as soon as possible..
yeah...

has been 16 days..
mayb we r in the same class..
moral studies also in the same class..
i reali hope tat v stil can b fren like b4..
it seems something blocking us..
mayb there's so much happen between us..
i just can pay full attention in my studies just to forget u for a while..
during the moment b4 i sleep..i also cant sleep..all my mind not empty at tat moment..
i just can listen to songs to make myself feel better..
today malanie told me something..i am happy to hear tat..
i would think tat u din lie to me b4..i choosed to trust u..
time is the main medicine for me..
i just hope tat i wil not look backward anymore..
my sis told me tat..time wont wait me..time wont pity me even i stop my life at tat sad moment..
finally i awake..i hope tat i can sleep at nite without listening songs..
mayb v all wil be busy on our own studies..i believe time is the most realiable evidence to prove myself to u..
goodluck to myself..